A church community that heals & doesn't enable

From going through the process of adopting a older child, one of the most powerful things our family has learned is the idea of 'being an enabler'. We learned (sometimes the hard way) that some behaviors we thought were cute or loving were sometimes cute and loving, but sometimes good old fashioned manipulation to avoid an uncomfortable situation that really needed to be dealt with.

To enable someone means you make it possible for them to be able to do a certain behavior or to think a certain way. Through how you interact with them, what you say, what you encourage or discourage in them, etc, you make it possible for them to grow in a good and healthy direction. The opposite is also true in that you can can also encourage them to move along a path that is unhealthy or even bad or sinful through what you say, do, accept, etc.

When you think about the passages from scripture that talk about how we are to interact with each other (including what we are to do together, how often we are to be together in one kind of setting or another, what we are to encourage/discourage, etc), what are the things that God asks of us or calls us to do as fellow believers called to live as his family? What are things he calls us not to do?

How do we sometimes enable unhealthy or even sinful lifestyles, attitudes or behaviors among our communities as believers? What are some specific behaviors that get a 'pass' by how we avoid them, ignore them or even protect them? What does the church's leaders, teachers, etc do to help or hurt? How could we be more of a church that helps people heal from wounds and grow in the kingdom rather than be enablers?

How long do I give this thing anyway?

People...it's not that the world takes all kinds, it's just that we got'm. God calls all sorts of people from all sorts of backgrounds through Jesus to seek The Kingdom & to join with others who are also called. And the Bible is definitely peppered with teachings for believers to put each other first, serve, reach out, do good to all people, especially to those who are also believers, etc...

So how do we handle it when we are called to, as a part of the local body that we commit to, are asked to join together in certain kinds of groups based on ministries or age groupings or whatever and grow and serve together? So often we are tempted by our own desires to just be with the people we naturally want to be with or we are goaded by the loudest squeaky wheels among us to do the easiest thing (be in a 'worship service') rather than work at being in groups that really challenge us to grow.

What have you experienced with churches and groups 'at church'?

Given that artificially created groups of any size in a church go through good and bad times, what are the good things you've experienced with groups? ...what have been the downsides? ...what parts have challenged you to grow? ...what parts have you been tempted to take the easy road out on?

How do you interpret some of those teachings from Paul about putting each other first and serving each other? (Can't remember any? Read through Galatians 6, Ephesians 4-6, and Philippians 2 as a brief reminder.) What do those mean for your walk with God and with God's people?